February 15, 2006

Each of my days goes something like this:

6:30 am. Fall out of bed groggy and stumble around with shaky hands to make coffee. Shake things a lot. Wash teeth.
7:15 am. Put on a smile. Go write some manuals.
8:00 am. Start shuffling large amounts of papers on your desk.
9:00 am. More coffee.
10:00 am. Play with scissors.
11:00 am. Create several flowcharts, all showing the exact same thing.
12:00 pm. Lunch. Feast on a juicy piece of dead animal dripping fat.
1:00 pm. More coffee. Scissors. Flowcharts.
5:00 pm. Leave work. Buy something nice to fill the gaping hole in your soul. Today it was speakers.
6:30 pm. Dance naked to the crackling pitch of new speakers. Happiness sounds like deep bass.
7:00 pm. Discover that songs have more than one dimension. Who knew?
9:00 pm. Draw a picture. Make sure it has lots of penis.
10:00 pm. Levitate.
11:30 pm. Fall into a coma.

Rinse. Repeat as necessary.